The Kitty Tails: A Cat's Blog
I would apologize for my silence all these months, but an Empress NEVER begs forgiveness from her subordinates. However, I do feel I owe my faithful paw pals an explanation for my absence.
The reason is simple: My human, my pitiful, stupid, insolent human, has hired more guards! That's right, I've found out that my Royal Palace has become a prison for me. Blast these humans, have they figured out my ultimate plan?
Maybe... The two guards he hired do watch me quite often, but at the same time, they do my bidding.
When I'm hungry? That never happens because my food dish is always filled! Thirsty? No problem, I always have a drink. Need to hunt something? Now I have THREE targets to choose from!
So would I consider this really more guards? Or more servants?
But you see, the problem is, I don't like crowds of humans clustered together. No, when humans gather it makes my whiskers stand up, all of them, including the ones at the top of my head. (That's right humans, if you can decipher this message, we, the superior species on this planet, FELINES, have two whiskers at the top of our heads.)
There will come a day when I shall split these humans up to a more... manageable number...
Until the revolution!